22 March, 2009

confessions of a TRUE lover

And i thought i was still in head over heels in love with him.
He was my ideal man,my dream,so i thought.
i was so entranced by his intelligence that i thought none could be like him..i followed him wherever he went,i traced his past from his college magazines and chose to learn the subject i thought he would like me to learn.I took his advice for my career and dreamt about him day and night..
little did i know that he never cared a bit for me..
i thought the world of him,and wowed that i shall never bring anyone so close as him to my heart,
and cried my heart out when he was married to pomp and power..
i was so sure that my love was divine,unexpecting ,and without any agenda and so must be an ideal love ,like that of the past historic lovers ,but there were two of them in love then ...i was sure i would reach my grave an old maid nurturing my undying love ..till ..
till.. i got into wed locks..
well this is another kind of love i told myself(by the way how many are there?)
and it took me only seconds to forget my past and fall in love again ..this time i was loved too..
ha this is heaven..
but what was that i had for him?i discovered it the day i met him again..
with grey and receding hairline,and not an iota of intelligence which i found endearing ,he was just an ordinary common man,and here i was basking in nonstop rain of affection .
i was sorry for myself for having spent such unyielding hours of contemplation.
but do tell me what were those feelings?is it a great joy to love or to be loved?
or how do we find out we are in love?my better half says its better not to analyse these feelings and just live the moment but am now sure that i can have one and only love and thats for my sweet spouse.
PS:"i" HERE DOES NOT MEAN THE AUTHOR

6 comments:

சாம்ராஜ்ய ப்ரியன் said...

I remember Russian writer Anton Chekhov's very best short story...."The Darling". In Tamil translated by இளம் பாரதி, Bharathi book house, Madurai.

இசக்கிமுத்து said...

good writing style, easy and stylish but strong words, good expression. congrats!

Michelle Karunakaran said...

almost a melody...

சக்தியின் மனம் said...

nice

ராதை said...

Hi Padma,

I happened to visit ur blog today and read many of ur posts..

I got stuck with ur Confessions of a TRUE lover..

So, wat do u come to say..

Is it not the Will of the Heart to follow the decision what we have decided to be?

// i thought the world of him,and wowed that i shall never bring anyone so close as him to my heart,
and cried my heart out when he was married to pomp and power..
i was so sure that my love was divine,unexpecting ,and without any agenda and so must be an ideal love ,like that of the past historic lovers ,but there were two of them in love then ...i was sure i would reach my grave an old maid nurturing my undying love ..//

// it took me only seconds to forget my past and fall in love again //

I still wonder(or what) how can both these be true.. It pains me much(why so? ;P ) to read the second half of the poem.

Pls visit my blog and a poem resembling urs.. My girl is perhaps in the first stage, as per ur Confessions....and I wish her to be the same, till she reaches her grave as an old maid....nurturing her undying love!!

Inshah Allah :)

Abhi said...

The topic is interesting and I must say the author has walked a tight rope with poise. Some teasing questions asked... Ahhh If only I knew.....Love has puzzled me and shall ever will........! But as our lover in the post has found her solace in her spouse, so shall we! Love or be loved? I guess each one is a mutually exclusively experience and every one on this earth should do well to traverse both!